So somehow I hit tilt on Sunday and a switch flipped. I've been doing low carb, and the test strips are showing a hint of ketones today.
The show is in five weeks and I just had to order Official Company Scrubs - which I ordered in small. They are JUST barely wearable, so they should fit reasonably well once I'm down 10 pounds and more.
I've been hearing about cauliflower mash as a filler or substitute for mashed potatoes for years. There's always been a mental roadblock, though, like "that can't be right" - even though I love cauliflower. I learned about cauliflower "rice" this year and loved that, so I finally took the plunge and bought a small food processor yesterday.
Cauli mash is absolutely divine. It wasn't a lot of food prep - just microwaving the cauli, breaking it into pieces that would fit in the food processor, adding a few tasty things (i.e. butter and a bit of cheese) and hitting "Puree."
I know everybody has their safe/comfort zone foods, and I know a lot of people might not add the high fat foods that I do, but even plain it was delicious and creamy. If you want a lower everything alternative to rice (grate/chop the cauli) or mashed potatoes (puree it), give cauliflower a chance.
I know I copied stuff here that I wrote when things blew up with Hummingbird, but here both my health and my livelihood at stake. The anger is even more intense, but the risks of speaking up (almost nonexistent with Hummingbird) are high. No, I'm not really handling it well. I spent today in a semi-zombie mode, sweaty and scatterbrained. I used the opportunity to do a play-through of Super Mario World from the Super Nintendo system, a throwback to the 90s. Charlie found me up in the middle of the night the day the CNO told me she wouldn't be offering me permanent wound care. On Saturday he said he noticed I'd clearly been having a shitty week and had planned to hang out and distract me. He bought himself a Wii U (something we've both been talking about, but it's not in my budget quite yet and we're not going to be buying household stuff together), and lots of original Nintendo and Super Nintendo games are available. We went to a combination microbrewery, restaurant, and bookstore that I've been meaning to check out since he mentioned it a very long time ago. I opted for a pint Charlie and the Chocolate Stout with my Hemingway sandwich. I'm on the fence about posting pics, as I don't want anything to be personally identifiable, but all the beers and menu items were all literary references. It was fabulous. Charlie also had a pint (Cream & Punishment) and he wanted to hang out for a minute before driving (though he's 6'2", heavy, and virtually impervious to alcohol), so we browsed the small bookstore. They had an original Nintendo hooked up to a big screen TV, and apparently you can just hang out and play (OY VE!). The one game of my childhood that isn't on Wii U is the original Tetris, and THEY HAD IT!!! I found that, amusingly enough, I seem to be a decent Tetris player when I'm drunk.* *I ordered a second Charlie and the Chocolate Stout while we played, and I am a total lightweight. My theory is that I was too tipsy to be anxious about game play. I didn't even have sweaty paws, lol. I also discovered that all the used books are $2-5. I got Women Who Write Plays (never heard of it, but it sounds right up my alley) for THREE BUCKS. If I had known it wasn't just books, but CHEAP books, I would've been in there a looong time ago! I've also told Charlie that we need to go there now and then for me to whip him at Tetris, since he's been a lifelong gamer and kicks my ass at everything else. I haven't played anything in 10-15 years, cut me a little slack... Tomorrow morning I have follow-up bloodwork done and will be talking to the clinic's occupational health department for guidance.
Today I grabbed Chief Nursing Officer and asked her to be a witness for my final attempt at communication with Employee Health Nurse about how my post-exposure treatment was mishandled. At this point my goal is not so much to make things right (literally impossible, some of the misdeeds are done and irreversible) but to get documentation of what has happened. I told both of them that after we talked, I would be writing an e-mail summary of our talk and asking them both to confirm it in writing.
Chief Nursing Officer and Employee Health Nurse:
I am writing to request written confirmation of what we discussed this morning as a follow-up to our previous conversation on the matter in August.
What you have told me is that:
-I do not have the right to know what the patient was tested for or what those test results were because it would be a HIPAA violation.
-Joe Schmoe from HR made the decision that I should not be allowed to leave before my shift ended on the day of exposure.
-Dr. Infectious Disease Consultant made the decision that I would not be offered HIV post-exposure prophylaxis.
-Exposure policies are on the portal and I should look them up myself to see what policies governed decisions made by management after my exposure incident.
I appreciate your concerns. I would like to schedule a meeting next week with you, myself, Joe Schmoe and Current HR Person to review and resolve your concerns. Please let me know your availability on Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday of next week.
Employee Health Nurse
In the late afternoon, I approached Chief Nursing Officer (who has earned herself a decidedly unsavory blogname, but I haven't come up with it yet) to say that while I understood she was extremely busy, I would appreciate it if she could take a moment to write a reply regarding the content of our discussion with Employee Health Nurse. She said she would not reply in writing, that she would not confirm anything about our discussion, that "I'm staying out of it because I don't know what was involved."
I have not yet been confrontational at all, only asking them to provide evidence of what they've said and done so far. I e-mailed EHN back saying that I will be happy to set up a meeting with her AFTER she responds to my original e-mail request for confirmation of what she told me in today's meeting. I have an appointment on Monday for the next set of blood tests, and I've told the clinic I would like to talk to someone about how to research my rights. They said their Occupational Health department can help me out.
I will probably be e-mailing the CEO on Monday after the appointment, but it will depend on what I find out and how much I'm able to process it that day. I already know from Google searching that they've violated OSHA and CDC guidelines and regulations. It probably doesn't stop there. They have a limited time to act before my complaint goes to corporate and to said agencies, and it WILL no matter what, but it could go a little better or worse for them based on their actions in the next week.
Songs of the night: Losing My Religion, Sugar We're Goin' Down
"That was out of line," said the CEO when I CCed an email to corporate wound care asking for an update on my wound care application. "I've decided we need only experienced wound care nurses so I've hired two new people," said the CNO who's left my application hanging for 4 weeks.
Next step: formal complaint against the quality manager for refusing to let me seek assessment and treatment after bloodborne pathogen exposure, taking a month to do a risk eval, then sending me a certified letter recommending I get the Hep B vaccine she refused to administer when I was hired. Let’s hear “That was out of line” when I get corporate involved on that one, Mr. CEO.
Don't worry, there will be pics coming of my mini-escapade with Mich. We didn't burn Kentucky to the ground, but I'd like to think it was because we only had one night.